im just laying in my bed, trying to realice that my brother is gone when im back home.
i havent really recognized it until now, at ten a clock swedish christmas...
I am supposed to clean my room, or i started until i started to think about how it will be at home, i mean he is my brother, he have been there for me in 17 years...
and we are very close, and that isn't really a big thing to cry over, but im crying now..
weird.
even if we have bad times, example when i will sleep, and he playing so loud music and i get psychical attacks on him. that is the worse thing ever, or when he always came up to my room when i was sleeping and woked me up and i just jelled at him, and i had forgot that the next morning, when he is sad because i said a lots of bad words.

well, i have to think that he is an adult now, he has growed up!

But he is still my brother, even if he will move, and even i he isnt there when im back :( sad but true. true..

i cant understand.

i'll miss him